I represent a growing number of ministers who express their ministries in other forms than the traditional congregation-based ministry. As a result, the expressions of my ministry seem to evolve as a reflection of my own life experiences. I began to do this particular work as a passionate reaction to what happened when my mother died in 2006. As a devout Catholic, she appropriately had a Catholic funeral mass. However, I was left with a sense that there was more to be done. I wanted a ritual or celebration of the life she had lived and the love she gave abundantly to so many people. I wanted us to come together joyfully as well as in our sorrow. In processing those feelings, I wrote my second book about my mom and decided to help people dealing with death.

The focus of my work in this area is to educate people about the new options that are emerging for how to say our final goodbyes when someone dies. The full range of meaningful choices is no longer contained within the typical product and service offerings of funeral homes. By helping people to understand this and encouraging them to take the initiative of thinking through their personal preferences before preplanning with a funeral home, they can save money by making informed choices that are meaningful and appropriate for them.

In addition to providing community education programs about the new options that are available for creating heartfelt memorials and tributes, I also consult for funeral directors and clergy on updating their offerings to accommodate an increasingly diverse population and their needs.

My favorite part of this work is interviewing people one-on-one to document their preferences; to design meaningful ceremonies, rituals and memorials; and to capture their life stories. When asked to do so, I also officiate memorials services and celebrations that truly reflect the beliefs, values and life circumstance of the deceased and his or her family.

For those who would like support through their grieving process, I offer grief counseling. Each journey of grieving is unique to the individual mourner and to his or her relationship with the deceased. In our work together, I help clients to:

• Give themselves permission to engage in the grieving process and to honor its expressions and duration.
• Give validity to their experience by expressing and sharing it.
• Acknowledge and accept the contradictory emotions of the grieving process.
• Find their way into a newly defined life without the deceased.

An effective memorial service or celebration
gives solace to the bereaved,
dignity to the departed,
and heartfelt memories to the assembled mourners.

A memorial service or celebration offers an opportunity not only to mourn the death of a loved one, but to honor and celebrate his/her life. Whether in addition to, or instead of, a traditional religious funeral, a memorial is an opportunity to say goodbye in your own unique way.

The death of a loved one can be extremely stressful - overwhelming, even. Creating a memorial celebration can be helpful in moving through the grieving process. It’s a way to express what’s in our hearts.

At its best, a memorial deeply connects us to the deceased, ourselves, one another, God, and to the essential meaning and purpose of our lives. A memorial also pays tribute to the source(s) from which the deceased drew meaning in his or her life.

A memorial service or celebration allows us to acknowledge, honor, and give tribute to the gifts and challenges our loved one brought into our lives.

Unlike religious funerals, memorials follow no specific format. They can be customized to the beliefs, values and life expressions of the deceased and his/her family and friends. Meaningful ceremonies don’t just happen, however. They require thoughtful consideration and planning.

Please feel free to contact me if I can be of service to you.

• Capturing your life story.
• Documenting your preferences.
• Planning a memorial.
• Officiating a memorial.
• Grief Counseling.
• Community education programs.
• Consulting services for funeral homes on best practices and social change.
• Workshops for seminaries on creating heartfelt memorial services.